The Internal War Between Sin and God's Law

I am a perfectionist. I have a tendency to expect perfection from myself. I expect myself to be a model Christian, to always be productive, to always act happy, to always do everything right, and I tend to believe that if I do these things, if I am perfect, God will be more happy with me.

But the truth is, I'm far from perfect. I don't always wake up at the time that I want to, I am not always productive, I loose my temper, and I don't always stick to my workout schedule.

But that's okay.

Because of Jesus, I don't need to worry about being perfect. God loves me just as much when I can't do anything right as when I seam to do everything right.

My goal in life should not be perfection, it should be to better display the glory of God and the furthering of His Kingdom. I need to remember: 

God's glory is best displayed through my imperfections, not my perfections.

After all, we need Jesus because of our sin. A doctor can't heal someone who isn't sick. So why would Jesus die for perfect people? On the contrary, Jesus came because we are sinful, wretched, imperfect people. We need Jesus because we need saving.

We should seek to become better versions of ourselves out of thankfulness for Jesus. The purpose of life should not be to gain God's approval. We already have that! We seek self-discipline because we love God. And when we love God that much, we will grow to become better people, not perfect people. 

So we humbly go before the Lord, out of thankfulness, out of understanding of who God is and who we are in light of Him, and remembering that we will always be imperfect as long as we are here on earth. We ask for God's help because, the only way that we can truly give all glorify God is by the help of God Himself. 

We are no more beautiful that when we are at the feet of Jesus.

We can do nothing apart from Christ.

I can relate to these lyrics from "Lord, I Need You" by Matt Maher:

Lord, I come, I confess

Bowing here I find my rest

Without you I fall apart

You're the One that guides my heart

Lord, I need You, oh, I need You

Every hour I need You

My one defense, my righteousness

Oh God, how I need You

Where sin runs deep Your grace is more

Where grace is found is where You are

Where You are, Lord I am free

Holiness is Christ in me

Lord, I need You, oh I need You

Every hour I need You

My one defense, my righteousness

Oh God, how I need you

So teach my song to rise to You

When temptation comes my way

When I cannot stand I'll fall on You

Jesus, You're my hope and stay

Lord, I need You, oh I need You

Every hour I need You

My one defense, my righteousness

Oh God, how I need You

I'd like to close with this passage from Romans:

So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand.

For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being,

but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members.

Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin.

Romans 7:21-23, 25

When life takes a hard left turn...

Do you feel stuck? Like, your in a hard place in life that you can't seam to get out of? Do you feel alone? Or maybe like everything in life seams to be going wrong and you cant do anything about it? Maybe your like me and while God has blessed your life right-now, you can't seam to get past the past.

Whatever it is, you are either in a trial, have been recently, or will be soon.

There is hope.

I'd like to share a few things with you, dear reader, that I have learned through the hard times and maybe it will help you, as it has done for me.

The foundational comfort to my soul has been this: to dwell and rest in the character of God. 

God is sovereign over all the things that happen in our life. He causes us to go through tough times. When we understand who He is, we can understand why He does what he does.

So, here is a list of some of God's characteristics that came to mind when I was processing this three months ago:

1. God is the creator and sustainer of all creation.

Imagine this big, great, powerful God. He is terrifying and perfect. He is so huge and wonderful, you can't even comprehend it! That is our God. And that great and powerful God has got control over every little detail in your life, from how the your tiny hair grows on your skin to the next election and whoever it will be that will be the president next. Nothing, absolutely nothing is outside of His control.

2. God sees the things we can't.

God sees or past, he sees our present, and he sees the future. He knows each and every person. He sees the kind of people that we and those around us are behind closed doors. He knows what will happen if things continue, or had continued the way that it was going.

3. God loves us.

Please take a moment to understand. This is not a simple fact. After all, God is the very embodiment of love. His whole character is formulated around His person being love. God, the great creator and sustainer of all creation, the God who sees the kind of sinful person that you are behind closed doors, this God chooses to love you with a love that is so much greater than any we could ever imagine. His is a love that never ends and never fails. He will never leave you nor forsake you. It pursues you, even when you don't want to be. It is steadfast, strong, immovable, a love that will never change no matter how badly we mess up. Because of Christ Jesus and His work on the cross, we don't have to worry about being worthy of love. God already loves us.

4. God works all things for good.

No matter how hard things get, we can rest assured that it is meant for our good. God never does anything for evil intentions. It is always out of love that He does what He does. This gives us hope. All of the evil, all of the sin, all of the things that just don't go right, they can all be used for good. They will be used for good, thanks to our loving Father.

So, why do bad things happen?

Trials are meant to point us to Christ. They are God's way of reminding us of who is in control. Honestly, we will never really know why we go through the trials that we do. Maybe we will learn in heaven. We cannot fully know what good comes out of what happens. 

In the end, it comes down to these two things: 

1. Do you know who God is?

and

2. Are you willing to trust Him no matter what?

My hope is that we can all answer "yes". For, it is only is resting in the character of God that true joy, comfort, and satisfaction is obtained.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make straight your paths.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Here goes nothing...

It has been over a year since I last posted. Its strange just how much can happen in a year. I've graduated high-school, finished up my freshman year of college (thanks to duel-credit), and been through a hand full of tough times. The most recent hard time was three months ago today, when I broke up with my fiance. 

Its crazy how life can change. Just three months ago I was planning out a wedding, with no plans to continue college, and all the hopes and dreams of being married and having a family of my own. Life seamed to have taken a hard left turn when we had to break-up. But, I have found that no matter how confusing and painful something is, it is part of God's sovereign plan and it's meant for good. All of the sleepless nights, all of the broken dreams, all of the broken relationships, it is all meant for good... even though I can't quite see it yet.

So, here goes nothing, I guess... I am attempting to start this blog back up, with hopes that not only it'll help others, but it''ll help me too. Because, after all, no one learns more than the teacher.